We then get a quick description about Dead Dave's bar, the fact that she has two hours before vampires should be up around.
Insert clothes p0rn here.
Insert gun p0rn here.
Rehash of JC, what he looks like, the fact that she's halfway to becoming his human servant, the fact that she's carrying enough ammo to take over a small country is in case he doesn't take 'no' for an answer... It's all very riveting.
Anita than has a wank fest about how she's momentarily blinded when she enters the bar because its so dark inside. How she doesn't think cowboys from the old Westerns were actually scanning the pub they walk into but were actually wanting for their eyes to adjust before than wondering why no one shot them while that was happening...
WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH THIS RANDOM FUCKING PLOT POINT??
Since it's now 5pm on a Thursday afternoon, Dead Dave's is overflowing with people in suits, there's a few people who are tradies but the majority of the crowd are office people. Anita then bitches that despite Dave's attempts his pub had become trendy.
Why does Anita make it sound like a bad idea? Does she hate the idea of a vampire pub becoming popular? Or does she just dislike that vampire fans (famps? Fmpires?) come to her hangout spot??
She meets up with Irving, who was saving a seat for her. He jokes that she should admire how many dragons he had to fight off to keep the seat for her.
Anita internally bitches that she can smell whiskey on his breath before telling him that dragons are easy and he should try fighting off vampires sometime,
Hrm... This..
Yeah, no. Sorry Anita but the giant fire breathing lizard would terrify me a lot more, and would somehow be at least the tiniest bit harder to slay... Just saying.. As my opinion as a casual bystander that is.
We get another insulting description of Luther, the daytime barkeep/manager of this place. Anita bitching about how he's currently serving a group of people who are so happy that if they got any happier that'd be passed out on the floor.
Seriously, what does Anita have against people having a good time??
Irving passes over a small mountain worth of paperwork, Anita asks if she could take it home with her. A request Irving declines since apparently this is the original copy of some such as he had to pretty much had to sell his soul to the reporter covering the story just to borrow it for the night.
Wait... Wait a moment, wasn't Irving going to print out his own copy of this crap? I thought that was why he needed an hour before giving it to Anita, now your saying he didn't print it out and instead borrowed it off a fellow reporter?? That's... That's just stupid. Bad author. No cookie!
Anita continues bashing anyone who has a drink, saying that when you get drunk enough everything is funny. LKH... That is a horrible stereotype! There's five different kinds of drunk you know! And I have youtube evidence!!
Five kinds of drunk people - Danisnotonfire
Anita comments that there is no way in hell she could read all this paperwork here, Irving grins and says that he'll follow her anywhere, which means he could have met Anita at her place as she first requested...
This plot point is making less and less sense and I'm getting more and more annoyed at it.
Luther wonders over, and has horrible, HORRIBLE health standards as he merely takes Irving's glass, refills it than hands it back.
NO! WASH YOUR FUCKING GLASSES BOY! AND STOP SMOKING NEAR CUSTOMERS!
Yes, I'm well aware that when this book was released it was normal to smoke in pubs and stuff, it was still illegal for the workers to do it though for obvious reasons! SJKDSKJNDSJKN
-cough-
He poured me a glass of orange juice. We pretend it is a screwdriver. I'm a teetotaler, but why would I come to a bar if I didn't drink?
To socialize? Get out of the house? Eat? Meet up with friends?
And seriously, who goes to a pub, then sits there to watch what everyone is ordering in case someone doesn't drink??
What would happen if someone did find out she wasn't drinking grog? Would they call the police? Instantly know she's a vampire slayer? Run out of the building in case she starts handing out AA pamphlets??
I'm... I'm going to leave it here for now. This chapter is crazy long and I don't want another 'chapter 6' incident.
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