The Laughing Corpse: Chapter 9

I hate funerals. At least this one wasn't for anyone I had particularly liked. Cold, but true. Peter Burke had been an unscrupulous SOB when alive. I didn't see why death should automatically grant him sainthood. Death, especially violent death, will turn the meanest bastard in the world into a nie guy. Why is that?

Because maybe you only ever saw one side of him? Has that ever crossed your mind Anita?
Besides that, rose-coloured glasses and all that, everything always looks better in hindsight. Even though you know you were completely miserable in that situation, you tend to only remember the best aspects of a person/job/scenario.

We learn that it is now August and that Anita is lurking at the funeral in a black dress and sunglasses, internally bitching about the funeral and how Burke was an animator hence why she's here. Don't worry though, according to the all knowing Anita Blake he wasn't a very good one.
She goes on to explain then when one animator dies all animators come together for the funeral for some reason. She then inserts a joke about how the only one you couldn't go to is your own but since they can raise the dead maybe even that isn't a good excuse.....

They reason they didn't raise Burke to ask who shot him to death, is because they used a magnum loaded with hallow-point bullets to shoot him just behind the ear leaving him without a head. Anita snarkily goes on about how even zombies need mouths to talk. But he still has hands no? He can write, I think a better excuse would be zombies still need freaking brains to operate.

We get a description of other animators that are at the funeral, Anita whinges about their wives, it's all very boring so I'm not going to go into detail about it because who really gives a fuck right?

Ugh, I'd actually forgotten about this next part.... It's well it's interesting to say the least.

Burke's wife is sobbing next to the grave as you would be, her two kids are clinging to their grandpa's hands watching her with hollow eyes.

They watched their mother break down completely, useless to them. Her grief was more important than theirs. Her loss greater. Bullshit.

I'm starting to think that LKH doesn't quite understand how grief works, You can't help others until you are settled. Plus, HER HUSBAND JUST FUCKING DIED, LET THE POOR WOMEN GRIEVE!

Anita hops up on her high horse, looking down on the grieving mother, thinking back to how her mother died on her and it's horrible etc etc etc. How the dirt is covered with fake grass so no one can see it. I'm not sure what the point she's trying to get to is but I'm quickly losing interest in this rambling.

Anita was so busy thinking about how a good coffin can keep the dirt and worms out of it but not decay that she completely missed the end of the funeral.
We instantly get back to bashing the grieving wife, as apparently she now can't stand on her own without head, before leaping for the coffin trying to open it up. Anita screams that they should stop her, thinking that she said it too loud and people are looking at her now or some crap.
By the time Anita gets to the coffin the wife is on the ground, showing everyone her slip with mascara running down her face. You know, clearly caring what people think of her.

Anita wonders over to the grandpa holding the two kids, she has too say 'sir' twice to get his attention, before stating that he should take the kids away from this scene. He blankly tells her that it's his daughter falling apart in front of him. Anita debates if it's grief or drugs (?) making him this addled.
She repeats that he should take the kids to the car, when the wife starts screaming the guy doesn't even look at her.
So she plays hardball by stating that he might be her father, but he's also these kids grandfather and that he should act like it. He naturally gets pissed at this and says that she should leave.
She looks at the kids, thinks that she survived it so maybe they will then stalks away.

Now I'm kinda torn about this, the kids shouldn't really see a scene like this, But at the same time Anita isn't making a very good case for herself by being a know-it-all bitch.

Either way Anita wonders over to where Manny and his wife Rosita are, the wife invites Anita around to lunch after church on Sunday so she can meet her cousin Albert (Rosita's cousin not Anita's) and how he's an engineer and good provider.
Anita points out that she doesn't need a good provider. Rosita sighs, stating that she earns too much for a women..........
....Because it makes her not need a man.....
.....
....
...
..
.

Why... WHY would you write that??

Anita goes on about how if she ever married it would be for love not money, before pausing and asking if she was waiting for love, which she wouldn't because she's too tuff for that shit ya'll!

Manny stops this conversation from getting anymore awkward reminds Rosita that they need to pick their son Tomas up from kindy. Rosita makes another mention of how handsome Albert is but Anita is determined not be dragged into this scenario.
Jamison (the animator that Anita happily crapped all over in the first book) wonders over, stating that he's happy so many turned up for the funeral.
He then mentions that the police won't talk to the family about what happened, Anita thinks that St. Louis is currently giving Washington DC a run for their money murder wise -Gives some serious side eye- I find that doubtful... But lets just run with it.
And that the police are doing everything they can with the resources they have yadda yadda.

Anita goes on about how she usually dislikes Jamison because he's a flirt, bleeding-heart liberal (seriously what have the libs done to you guys that makes them so bad??) and thinks that vamps are just humans with fangs (technically they are) but right now he's being real so she asks him what he wants from her.

Jamison points out that she has dealings with the police, so maybe she can found out if they're working on any leads, what's their progress that sort of thing.
Anita thinks that those are pretty vague questions, but tells him that she'll see what she can do. Jamison gets all teary eyes and thanks her (for someone who was a utter SOB he has a lot of people mourning his death... Just saying)

They then have a quick conversation about his broken sunglasses which cost him 95 buckaroos, Anita thinks he must be kidding. Honestly though if I had the money and it was a pair that wouldn't break as soon as I put them on I'd happily pay that much. Quality over how much it fucking costs is my motto of the day.

They are starting to carry the coffin away when another male steps up to them, he asks Jamison if Anita is going to help them. This guy turns out to be John Burke who is apparently a pretty big name in the animator circles. Anita has a bit of a fangirl moment as she shakes his hand, thinking that he's the greatest animator and vampire slayer out of New Orleans. He apparently shakes her hand hard to see if she'll flinch, she doesn't of course because you know... Tuff!
She states that she's sorrow about his brother, and now that she knows Peter was related to a famous animator she actually means what she says.

Anita states that she's surprised John couldn't get the New Orleans police to ask about the investigation for him, John looks embarrassed before stating that they had an argument.
It turns out that they accused John of being involved in rituals because he's Vaudun... Don't you guys have laws harassment laws about this sort of thing??
Upon hearing this Anita asks John how long he's been in town for, which is a week.
John (I'm assuming, it's not explained) goes to to state that Peter had been missing two days before they found the body.

John says he needs to get back because his sister-in-law isn't taking the ordeal well. Anita asks him to look after the kids by keeping them away from the worst of the drama. John gets all teary eyed when he thinks about how he felt watching the wife throw herself onto the coffin and that it must be worse for the kids yadda yadda. He agrees to watch out for them.

I would talk to the police and find out what I could. I also had another name for Dolph. John Burke, biggest animator in New Orleans, voodoo (I don't know why she refuses to use capitals for Voodoo) priest. Sounded like a suspect to me.